20250728175757-acacea-lewis-Submission: Difference between revisions
From Tsadra Foundation Advanced Contemplative Scholarships
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|othermoney=I just started a part time job at $27 an hour, and I have $2k savings I am putting towards the retreat cabins which have not yet been built, hence the total cost including a Retreat dome from Pacific Domes, as well. That will be partially paid for by me and the rest by my precious Guru. | |othermoney=I just started a part time job at $27 an hour, and I have $2k savings I am putting towards the retreat cabins which have not yet been built, hence the total cost including a Retreat dome from Pacific Domes, as well. That will be partially paid for by me and the rest by my precious Guru. | ||
|letterofmotivation=During the time directly before my partners death at age 43, we had both aspired to go deeper into dharma practice and study after our child was born. We were even considering raising our first child in a buddhist retreat style community setting. I lost my child shortly after the death of my partner of 8 yrs, and that shattered my connection with reality as I knew it and exposed me deeply to the experiential concept of impermanence and suffering far more than I had been exposed to it before. I led a life before that point searching for tools to heal my body from numerous health conditions, tumors, endometriosis, lung disease and liver ailments that I had been suffering from and designed a school with my partners help to try and share meaningful advice and herbal knowledge to those underpriveleged or who weren't able to access higher levels of medicinal care in the alternative medicine sphere. Though my life was already dedicated to serving community at the time of my partners death, the mind rending screams that came out of me during the time of my partners passing, were underlying a silent calm stillness that supported me thru the process of cremating and funeral preparations for my spouse. The notion that my mind couldn't completely shatter and that there was truly a deeper buddha nature within not only myself, but all sentient beings.. was merely conceptual jargon and didn't seem very factual up until that experience. The years that followed that experience were frought with poor decisions and attachment to comfort through seeking closeness with people who did not have my best interests at heart and also I rushed into my previous patterns of unhealthy behavior: smoking tobacco, promiscuity... etc that did not only fail to fulfill me in any way, but made my waking reality like a living hell from which there was no permanent or even temporarily long lasting escape. I was plunged into deeper levels of desperation and deep longing to connect with my partner who had passed away and brought to joy whenever something of beauty came into my sphere of consciousness, be it a bird, flower or butterfly.. I started to use that longing to connect with the compassion and wisdom aspects of my own mind, slowly ad surely... it helped lead me out of depression and away from harmful behaviors and within a few years, I couldn't say that I was depressed any longer. This guiding process came from my first root guru, Lama Mike Crowley, who shared a connection with my partner somehow and felt that they knew of them from Wales. Even though my partner had never physically been to Wales, I knew that this connectedness was not accidental because I felt chills when he looked at my partners photo and seemed to fondly recognize them (pronouns: they/them). Futhermore, my late partner was a big fan of his book called "Secret Drugs of Buddhism" as me and my partner worked with some entheogens for the purpose of healing sexual trauma and depression before coming to dharma. On one fateful night we stayed up till 3am reading Amitabhas Pure Land Sutra and it was so beautiful we made reading sutras a part of our weekly spiritual practice, (over 7 yrs ago now). My first guru would give me Shamata instruction and then leave me to practice for a few months or a year and then give further instructions for visualization.. around 2023 he announced I was ready to take my Bodhisattva Vows and I did so happily. That same year I completed my first Niguma Yoga retreat with Yangsi Kalu Rinpoche and I had felt I had made a new dharma friend not knowing the scale and previous life history of the 1st Kalu Rinpoche. I immediately fell in love with Niguma Yoga and the following year in 2024 I made a point to take another 4 day retreat with Kalu Rinpoche to study Niguma Yoga. After that life changing experience I knew for sure that I had to go deeper in to my Shangpa Kagyud practices. The next events I attended were Mahakala with Kalu Rinpoche and Niguma Yoga that was held at Ser Cho Ling. That was the day at Ser Cho Ling I had the pleasure of meeting my primary Guru, Wangchen Rinpoche. He greeted me with a deeply knowing look of recognition and I knew from that time on I would be spending a lot of time at Ser Cho Ling. I then signed up for my first Nyungne in 2024 and practiced diligently with Wangchen Rinpoche and started Ngondro Simultaneously. After a year, I was encouraged that I would make a good nun by Wangchen Rinpoche and I took my vows with his Holiness Tai Situ Rinpoche in March on March 26th in 2025. That was one of the most life chaning journeys I had ever had... since then Wangchen Rinpoche suggested I get ready immediately for three year retreat. | |letterofmotivation=During the time directly before my partners death at age 43, we had both aspired to go deeper into dharma practice and study after our child was born. We were even considering raising our first child in a buddhist retreat style community setting. I lost my child shortly after the death of my partner of 8 yrs, and that shattered my connection with reality as I knew it and exposed me deeply to the experiential concept of impermanence and suffering far more than I had been exposed to it before. I led a life before that point searching for tools to heal my body from numerous health conditions, tumors, endometriosis, lung disease and liver ailments that I had been suffering from and designed a school with my partners help to try and share meaningful advice and herbal knowledge to those underpriveleged or who weren't able to access higher levels of medicinal care in the alternative medicine sphere. Though my life was already dedicated to serving community at the time of my partners death, the mind rending screams that came out of me during the time of my partners passing, were underlying a silent calm stillness that supported me thru the process of cremating and funeral preparations for my spouse. The notion that my mind couldn't completely shatter and that there was truly a deeper buddha nature within not only myself, but all sentient beings.. was merely conceptual jargon and didn't seem very factual up until that experience. The years that followed that experience were frought with poor decisions and attachment to comfort through seeking closeness with people who did not have my best interests at heart and also I rushed into my previous patterns of unhealthy behavior: smoking tobacco, promiscuity... etc that did not only fail to fulfill me in any way, but made my waking reality like a living hell from which there was no permanent or even temporarily long lasting escape. I was plunged into deeper levels of desperation and deep longing to connect with my partner who had passed away and brought to joy whenever something of beauty came into my sphere of consciousness, be it a bird, flower or butterfly.. I started to use that longing to connect with the compassion and wisdom aspects of my own mind, slowly ad surely... it helped lead me out of depression and away from harmful behaviors and within a few years, I couldn't say that I was depressed any longer. This guiding process came from my first root guru, Lama Mike Crowley, who shared a connection with my partner somehow and felt that they knew of them from Wales. Even though my partner had never physically been to Wales, I knew that this connectedness was not accidental because I felt chills when he looked at my partners photo and seemed to fondly recognize them (pronouns: they/them). Futhermore, my late partner was a big fan of his book called "Secret Drugs of Buddhism" as me and my partner worked with some entheogens for the purpose of healing sexual trauma and depression before coming to dharma. On one fateful night we stayed up till 3am reading Amitabhas Pure Land Sutra and it was so beautiful we made reading sutras a part of our weekly spiritual practice, (over 7 yrs ago now). My first guru would give me Shamata instruction and then leave me to practice for a few months or a year and then give further instructions for visualization.. around 2023 he announced I was ready to take my Bodhisattva Vows and I did so happily. That same year I completed my first Niguma Yoga retreat with Yangsi Kalu Rinpoche and I had felt I had made a new dharma friend not knowing the scale and previous life history of the 1st Kalu Rinpoche. I immediately fell in love with Niguma Yoga and the following year in 2024 I made a point to take another 4 day retreat with Kalu Rinpoche to study Niguma Yoga. After that life changing experience I knew for sure that I had to go deeper in to my Shangpa Kagyud practices. The next events I attended were Mahakala with Kalu Rinpoche and Niguma Yoga that was held at Ser Cho Ling. That was the day at Ser Cho Ling I had the pleasure of meeting my primary Guru, Wangchen Rinpoche. He greeted me with a deeply knowing look of recognition and I knew from that time on I would be spending a lot of time at Ser Cho Ling. I then signed up for my first Nyungne in 2024 and practiced diligently with Wangchen Rinpoche and started Ngondro Simultaneously. After a year, I was encouraged that I would make a good nun by Wangchen Rinpoche and I took my vows with his Holiness Tai Situ Rinpoche in March on March 26th in 2025. That was one of the most life chaning journeys I had ever had... since then Wangchen Rinpoche suggested I get ready immediately for three year retreat. | ||
|FileHaveAcceptLetterUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Acceptance_Letter.pdf | |||
|AcceptLetterAuthorFirst=Wangchen | |AcceptLetterAuthorFirst=Wangchen | ||
|AcceptLetterAuthorLast=Rinpoche | |AcceptLetterAuthorLast=Rinpoche | ||
|FileHaveRetreatBudgCostUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Retreat_Costs.pdf | |||
|CostLetterAuthorFirst=Wangchen | |CostLetterAuthorFirst=Wangchen | ||
|CostLetterAuthorLast=Rinpoche | |CostLetterAuthorLast=Rinpoche | ||
|recom1NameFirst=wangchen | |FileHaveEligibilityDocsUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Eligibility_Requirements.pdf | ||
|recom1NameLast=rinpoche | |FileHaveCVUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_CV_Resume.pdf | ||
|FileHaveDharmaCVUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Dharma_Resume.pdf | |||
|FileHavePhotoUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Photo.jpg.jpeg | |||
|FileHaveDescriptFinSitUpld=2025-08-1_acacea_lewis_-_Financial_Situation.pdf | |||
|recom1NameFirst=wangchen | |||
|recom1NameLast=rinpoche | |||
|recom1Relate=GURU | |recom1Relate=GURU | ||
| Line 80: | Line 87: | ||
|recom2Relate=friend | |recom2Relate=friend | ||
}} | }} | ||
Revision as of 00:14, 1 August 2025
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