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 |letterofmotivation=I have seen for myself that even a small amount of practice and exposure to the dharma with limited understanding can bring great benefit and meaning to life and this gives me confidence that through the Mahayana path one can truly be of benefit and use to others in a vast way. I believe the opportunity to take part in this retreat would be a great help in going in this direction.
-While even one month in retreat first sounded daunting, and like something only for the highly evolved, doing these retreats at upstate NY and practicing at home have gradually instilled in me an aspiration to take part in the traditional three-year retreats that I had heard about. I talked with my teacher Tulku Dawa Rinpoche about it a couple of times and he was supportive of my aspirations. At the end of this September, we did a week-long retreat for Tara practice at Orgyan Osal Cho Dzong, located in an isolated area of eastern Ontario. From the limited practice that I have done, I have sometimes felt as if I was finally becoming slightly aware of beginningless delusion as the driving force of one's mental projections and suffering, and somehow during this short retreat, more than ever, this experience felt vivid. A few days after getting home, for some reason I felt that now was the time to research the possibility of a three-year retreat more earnestly. I had heard that Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche was doing one for Westerners in France and decided to get in touch with the coordinator there who sent me an information package. While mulling this over and listening to Rinpoche's teachings online, I felt deeply inspired by his clear explanations and evident compassion and felt a great longing to take part in this retreat under the guidance of this genuine master. Bearing in mind the four thoughts, refuge/bodhicitta and the great force of habitual tendency, I believe practicing in long-term retreat to be the ideal way to work with the samsaric state of delusion in which I find myself.
+While even one month in retreat first sounded daunting, and like something only for the highly evolved, doing these retreats at upstate NY and practicing at home have gradually instilled in me an aspiration to take part in the traditional three-year retreat. I've felt frustrated by the way that you would only start to really get used to being in retreat by the end of the month, and then it would be time to go home! I talked with my teacher, Tulku Dawa Rinpoche, about it a couple of times and he was supportive of my aspirations. At the end of September 2025 we did a week-long retreat for Tara practice at Orgyan Osal Cho Dzong, located in an isolated area of eastern Ontario. From the limited practice that I have done, I have sometimes felt as if I was finally becoming slightly aware of beginningless delusion as the driving force of one's mental projections and suffering, and somehow during this short retreat, more than ever, this experience felt vivid. A few days after getting home, for some reason I felt that now was the time to research the possibility of a three-year retreat more earnestly. I had heard that Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche was doing one for Westerners in France and decided to get in touch with the coordinator there who sent me an information package. While mulling this over and listening to some of Rinpoche's teachings online, I felt deeply inspired by his clear explanations and evident compassion and felt a great longing to take part in this retreat under the guidance of this genuine master. Bearing in mind the four thoughts, refuge/bodhicitta and the great force of habitual tendency, I believe practicing in long-term retreat to be the ideal way to work with the samsaric state of delusion in which I find myself.
-I spent week over the new years holiday at Gomde Pyrenees while Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche was visiting to open up the then just finishing  first 3 year retreat. This was a super inspiring experience and further cemented my committment to take part. Aside from the inspiration and faith I felt in Rinpoche's presence and from his teachings, it was really cool to meet  some of participants of the first group and this definitely made me feel more confident in my plans. Drupbon Lama Tenzin gave us a really good talk on the 3 year retreat and said on the subject of expectations that by the end of retreat we don't need to feel bad if were not realized; we will know how to practice dharma and be on the path and that's enough. I've kept this in my heart since.
+I spent a week over the new years holiday at Gomde Pyrenees while Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche was visiting to open up the then just finishing  first 3 year retreat. This was a super inspiring experience and further cemented my committment to take part. Aside from the inspiration and faith I felt in Rinpoche's presence and from his teachings, it was really cool to meet  some of participants of the first group and this definitely made me feel more confident in my plans. Drupbon Lama Tenzin gave us a talk on the 3 year retreat and said on the subject of expectations that, if by the end of retreat we're not realized, there's no need to feel bad; we will know how to practice dharma and be on the path and that's enough. I've kept this in my heart since.
 We all know the difficulties of trying to balance the spiritual path with everyday life's endless demands, complications and confusion. Especially with the drastic state of the world right now, it seems really important to do what you can to work with your own ridiculous thoughts and try to develop at least some basic compassion and wisdom. Without wanting to be too idealistic about what I may or may not accomplish, I think that being able to do this retreat and receive all of these profound teachings (ngondro, Sadhana practice, Dzogrim and Dzogchen) would be an extremely meaningful way to spend a few years, even for someone as spaced out and foolish as me. Also, while I will greatly miss my Palyul teachers, I can't help but feel that all of these masters speak with one voice and am excited to train in the Chokling Tersar tradition.